Two days ago was supposed to be one of the happier days of my life. My best friend of over ten years was getting married. We talked about this day for years and years. There were even times where we talked about it not happening for us, but it did for her and I couldn’t be any happier. On this day, while I was at the wedding, I found out my grandfather had passed away. I was heartbroken, but I didn’t want that to show on my face. I hate that I had to pretend that I wasn’t heartbroken. I had to pretend that losing someone that took me into their home when I was seven wasn’t devastating. Holding the emotion inside killed me, but I didn’t want to make this day sad for anyone else. I didn’t want to make the happiest day in the world for my best friend about me

My grandpa lived a long and eventful life. He was 90 years young. He had six boys and was married to my grandmother for 53 years. He worked to make sure his household was taken care of and he always did that without complaining. He suffered from alcoholism for a long time, and that’s what caused him to start getting sick. He had been sober for over 10 years, but he also found out he had Cancer five years ago. He was too old for them to do anything with it so he just lived through it. He lived longer than they probably expected. He was someone who didn’t like to argue, didn’t like anything complicated or confrontational.

It was hard for me to start back blogging. It just hurt to do anything. I couldn’t sleep or eat. Luckily I was blessed with some wonderful friends to deal with me in my time of need. Being able to just talk to people about what’s on your mind is a blessing in its self. Talk Therapy is one of the main ways to treat depression. I know there’s a lot of people like me that doesn’t really care for taking medication so talking is a good substitution for that. Talk to your peers about their issues and give feedback. Yes, we like a listener, but feedback is the confirmation we need to know that you’re actually listening.   Depression causes your mood to change (sometimes really drastically). When dealing with someone that’s going through a tragedy, expect multiple mood changes. Also, let that person be aware of them. We don’t want to upset you with our emotions without knowing we are doing so. It makes us feel bad. Communication is key when dealing with someone that has heavy emotion. Make sure you provide others with that shoulder to lean on. #thisiswhatdepressionlookslike

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