One thing I’m learning about having all this time to myself is that I’m not 100% happy with me. I’ve worked so much in life that I forgot who I am. I find it hard to find hobbies for me to do or even things to watch on TV. I’m so used to going to work and going home and relaxing. I’m not used to having time to do things to make me happy and that’s what I’m searching for now. Going to the gym is ok sometimes, when I’m not making it a mandatory thing. I need to learn how to make things fun vs making everything a chore.
Writing has always been a passion of mine. For a long time, even now, I didn’t think I was good enough to be a writer. I have disabilities to hold me back from it but I’m learning now to embrace it and have fun with it. We often don’t enjoy doing things anymore because we feel like if we’re not perfect then we shouldn’t be doing that. It wasn’t until I started taking yoga that I learned perfection is a figment of my imagination. Not giving up takes strength.
Honestly giving up is a part of the process. Sometimes we give up things just to make a full circle and start back up where we left off. Writing is something I’ve done and gave up on so many times. One big reason why is because I listen to so many opinions and take them all to heart.
Your life and everyone else’s isn’t the same and, although we should value everyone’s opinion that we care about, you shouldn’t take them all to heart . You have to start living for you! Making decisions for yourself is a part of adulthood. The decisions you make only affects you . Some cases they can affect the people around you but sometimes you have to put you above all of that I think about what makes you happy. Remember this, nine times out of 10 people are thinking about themselves when they give you an opinion on what you should do. They never actually stepping your shoes .
Right now, I’m working for me. I’m enjoying my alone time by doing things I want to do, and making decisions my way. I’m being selfish right now. I love everyone around me but I’m really loving this alone time to figure out my life. A lot of things don’t make sense to me right now ,but I don’t expect it to . I’m trying not to overthink the process and dwell on my past. I love and appreciate all the support for my love ones. Thank you for being here. Thank you for listening. #thisiswhatdepressionlookslike